It is difficult for me to believe that Saturday is going to be the 4th of July. My life is unrecognizable when I attempt to look back twelve months, much less 18 or 24. I still have hope. I still have joy. But so much is so different. I am truly sorry for the things I took for granted, but with each quiet moment I am making peace with permanent losses so I can be prepared for the opportunities that I know lie ahead.
This week was a demanding week for me. I face challenges with life balance on a regular basis, but I don’t think there have been any weeks when I faced so many major losses and challenges in every direction. My family is dealing with the second death in as many months, a good friend’s son had a major auto accident, another friend died suddenly, and the kids’ schools were in lock down. I have had these things happen before, but not all in the same week. I am really thankful for the diversion I have had practicing with my Copics. I wish there had been more time, but it helped me calm down and focus and I did not realize how much I needed that.
Turning forty gave me an amazing clarity and urgency about the practice of living out my priorities, just like the video. A week ago, I was in Louisiana with my family. It was another of those situations, exactly like Las Vegas, when I was in the exact place where I needed to be. I got the chance to spend time with so many people in my family who I really needed to spend time with. One of them is no longer with us and I’m working out my feelings about that. Obviously I am grieving, but I am also extremely thankful and joyful to have been blessed with the opportunity to speak with him one last time. I know it’s cliche’ to say to tell people you love them because you never know if that will be the last time you see them, but it is still true.
TJs Things 