Relationships are complicated.

Random moment. How do you separate after 40 years of marriage? I mean after all of that time, can’t people just add their own personal caves to the house and retreat when they get on each other’s nerves?

Last night, my husband and I were watching a movie about this man whose girlfriend/partner/s.o. informed him that she was expecting a baby. When she brought up the topic of getting married, he put her off. He said he would marry her, but he was working out some things with his plan, when the plan was to hold her off as long as possible, so he could be free should  a new woman, perceived as something better, come along. I was telling my husband that a lot of times red flags pop up during the course of a relationship if a man is not interested in committing and that a lot of women ignore those signs. When I decided I wanted to get married, if the guy across the table from me at the restaurant or next to me at the movie theater felt like he had fifteen to twenty years until he wanted to settle down, then that was our last date. I’ve run into women who had to catch and trap men, but I’ve just never been that pressed. I mean, if a man wants to get married, he expresses that desire to the woman in his life. At least this has been my experience.

2 thoughts on “Relationships are complicated.

  1. I hear what you’re saying … but sometimes the motives aren’t as straightforward as that. My 1st husband asked me to marry him because he thought he had to in order to keep me. Nevermind the fact that I had never even mentioned marriage before that moment. And nevermind the fact that he already had a wife at the time which I didn’t know about it.

    • I know there are times when people just straight up lie about where they want things to go in a relationship (I know another chick in blogland who married a guy who neglected to mention that he was married – messed up does not begin to describe), but I’ve also heard too many ladies say that they thought they could catch a man or change his mind when they got ample notice that said man was not interested in a commitment situation.

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